Until 5 years ago, my Mum kept asking me why I wasn't seeing someone or settling down. I kept asking the very same question myself. The last 5 years, My Mum has ceased down and so did myself. Then, almost everybody I met asked me the same question again since last year.
So, after the giving in some really deep thought, I wrote down the plus and minus of having a steady relationship and I came to a conclusion: I'm happily single at the moment.
Here are some reasons and advantages being single at the moment:
1. Freedom
I know that being in a relationship doesn't mean you are not free. But here it is more the real essence of it. I can make a decision career or personal wise without having to consult or consider my partner's situation. I feel so much easier to decide whether I want to travel or not, when to take my holiday or not, or when and where to have dinner.
2. The art of flirting
As I wasn't jumping directly into a relationship when I came out, I of course rumble around and did lots of cruising. A look in the eye, a gesture, an invitation of a smile, and the adrenalin of feeling someone new's skin are always exciting. I never believe that you can be faithful to just one person. I think it's a nature of a man either he is gay or not. Men just screws around. It will happen sooner or later. With my first boyfriend, we both believe that we couldn't be faithful to each other. so the flirting part was still allowed. So, I really enjoy still having this privilege to be able to flirt in bars or clubs.
3. Dramaless Life and No Repressed Emotions
That's more or less true. I know it can be nice to talk over a problem to your partner but also the potential drama can come from your partner. Especially if you live together, there are always these small things that annoy you. This is of course not always true. I'm more talking from the negative point of you.
4. Be my very own self
In a relationship, you tend to please your partner. You try to be the man that your partner wants you to be. Whether consciously or unconsciously. Then you are not your true self anymore.
5. The After Taste
I do believe there are some long lasting relationships (especially the ones that was built up in the 70's and 80's). But nowadays, I can see couples breaking up everywhere. It drags for months or even years or even the wounds never really closed up. I had some wonderful relationships before and I'm grateful for it. (Thanks D and thanks J for making who I am today). I just don't feel like going through it again one more time.
I'm saying all this because I have experienced both. I enjoyed both. But for now, I'm pretty happy on my own. Besides, you never know when your prince charming appears right in front of you. I'm not looking for him but if he do appears, you can't reject the power of this big thing called L.
